To Say You Lived | Rome

She looked at me and asked if I wanted the two tickets. I had made plans for tonight already. But forget those plans, I was going to see The Pope!

I was walking across the bridge from my bus stop to my school over the beautiful Tiber River when I had that feeling. The feeling I got when I tripped over the cobble stone street, when I had to wait 15 minutes in the cold for my bus, when I spent $4 on gelato. The feeling that I was here; I was in Rome.  It seems like a silly realization. Of course I am in Rome. But I think back to when I first received the email for studying abroad and laughed at myself because I knew it would never happen. Yet, here I am in one of the most indescribable places in the world.

Looking out over Italy

Usually I am not a fan of One Republic because their songs make me sad and I have a strong aversion to anything sad. Before I left I heard the song I Lived. Every time it came on the radio I would change the channel. One time I listened all the way through and my heart hurt because all I wanted to do was say that I truly lived. I knew I couldn't honestly claim that statement because it wasn't true. I lived my life on reserve, always holding back a little.

Oreo, Caramel, White Chocolate Gelato

But my time is here. It's my time to live each day and say that I truly lived. I go to class, get gelato or pizza for a snack, wander around the Italian shops, go see ruins, visit the Coliseum just because, go on a day trip to a Villa, plan trips around Europe, and walk into every church I can. It's my time to live, to enjoy, to learn, to grow, to be free.

A church I pass everyday at school

For a while back in Columbia, I didn't feel like me. I wasn't extremely happy and everyone knew I wanted to graduate and move on already. Rome is different. Rome fills me with so much joy that I can't help but smiling at everyone. This place makes me adventurous and spontaneous (two things no one would ever describe me as). Italy makes me want to be everything I can be and more.

When I accepted the tickets to see The Pope I knew I was changing. I was allowing myself to not be restricted, to not worry so much, and especially to not have to plan every moment out. In that moment I realized what life was meant to be: lived.

Day Trip to Villa D'Este

So I ask you, wherever you are, can you honestly say you are truly living? If not, it just might be time to do something about it.